


The Champion of Kirkwall - Champions Trials

by Tak



Series: The Champion of Kirkwall [1]
Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-30
Updated: 2013-06-30
Packaged: 2017-12-16 15:04:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/863375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tak/pseuds/Tak
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Faith Hawke, a young woman in the midst of a civil war.<br/>Trying to hold onto what's left of her family and the one man she cares about.<br/>With her best friend arriving from Kirkwall it become a story of friendship, and fighting an uprising.</p><p>Arianne is Hana's Hawke, thanks for letting me use her, and for role playing the bar scene.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Champion of Kirkwall - Champions Trials

Cold dripped through the entrance hall. The high grey stone walls held little comfort and less heat. Having more than keen sense of hearing, Hawke left the warmth of the hearth, she investigated the groaning of the heavy oak door at the entrance to her estate.  
A patch of candle light illuminated her guest, white hair glimmering with orange hints from the flame. The warmth showing off the Lyrium markings about his neck and arms. Hawks heart climbed into her throat. The last she had seen of Fenris was in the Slavers Hold. The emotions in capturing and killing one of his former tormentors had put him on edge, he stormed from her as she tried to console him. Knocking her hand from his shoulder scolding her for her kindness. She approached him, booted feet padding softly. He stood, meeting her half way. Forming words before she could think of any.  
"I've been thinking about what happened with Hadriana." He hesitated taking another step towards her. "I took out my anger on you, undeservedly so. I was not my self, I'm sorry."  
She mirrored his steps. Closing the gap between them one more pace. Her movements where slow, definite, quiet. As if she were approaching a wild animal.  
"I had no idea where you went. I was concerned." Her dulcet voice being absorbed into the hall, unlike his deep resonance. Which seamed to caress the stone after it washed over her.  
"I needed to be alone" He began, his voice heavy. "When I was a slave Hadriana was a torment, she would ridicule me, deny my meals, hound my sleep. Because of her status I was powerless to respond and she new it. The thought of her slipping from my grasp now. I couldn't let her go, I wanted to, but I couldn't."  
"What do you mean?" She asked, again edging closer, he seemed burdened by the events, she longed to reach out to him, to close the distance he kept between them.  
"This hate, I thought I had gotten away from it. But it dogs me no matter where I go." He growled "To feel it again, to know it was they who planted it in side me, it was too much to bare." He sighed in aggravation turning as he spoke. "but I didn't come here to burden you further."  
"You don't need to leave Fenris." She exclaimed reaching out catching his arm. The Lyrium veins beneath his skin flared, he turned on her like a beast. Locking the hand that touched him to her side. Slamming her back hard against the wall his other hand at her collar bone. In an instant as the cold blue flame had ripped through him, it vanished leaving him with a frightened and guilty look to see what head just done. He was close to her, hardly inches from her face. His body pressed against hers, the armour ridged against the cloth of her home clothes.  
She leaned forward a brash reaction, her lips meeting his, her hands as they were freed coming to his face. He was startled at first, though not with out returning her affections. She turned him to the wall, and allowed his gauntleted hands explore her soft body. There was urgency in his actions, as if some desperation or fear fuelled his passion. He pulled her closer with each kiss hungrily. His teeth brushing her flesh as his kisses trailed from her mouth to her neck. She pulled him back for a second. Long enough to grab the door handle and open the door just a crack. Peering into the main hall she looked for signs of her mother. It was all she needed, her mother had given Bethany nothing but grief for any boy she brought home. Hawke had never been caught in the company of a man, and she wasn't about to let her mother catch her red faced and flushed making a dash for more private quarters.  
Taking Fenris' hand she looked back to him. "If you'd like we can move this some where more comfortable."  
He nodded, struck dumb by the fervour.

Groaning the door shut reluctantly, cutting them off from the rest of the house. She leaned back on the door and looked at the man standing in front of her. For all the rage, and violence she had seen in him, now he seemed nervous, out of his depth. She reached out to touch his face hesitating before her skin made contact with his.  
"May I?" She asked softly.  
Again he nodded, his eyes closing as her hand gently stroked his cheek, tilting his head towards her. She kissed his bottom lip. So soft at first he almost missed it. For so many years his body had only known pain, he had forgotten what kindness felt like.  
He sighed at her kisses, finally allowing the shackles and fears of his past to fall. Hawke stepped back. "Allow me to begin."  
Unclasping her belt, She stripped off her top in one fluid motion revealing her fair skin, unmarred by tattoos unlike her face. Undoing her skirt and dropping that, then carefully peeling her boots off, She stood before him naked vulnerable. A gauntleted hand touched her waist, she gasped, he flinched.  
"The metal is very cold." She giggled "If you don't mind, we might leave the armour for battle."  
He pulled his hand out of his great dark gauntlet. Something that vary infrequently happened, is armour was a second skin, his flesh hadn't touched another, and his hand barely saw the light of day, he slipped out of the last gauntlet, and Hawke placed them aside. She took his now naked hands in her own. He could feel the warmth in her burning through him with a mixed sensation. Raising his hands to her lips she kissed his knuckles, her deep green eyes never leaving his.  
"You'll have to forgive me." He stammered swallowing the lump in his throat "I'm not use to people being this kind."  
She smiled, something he had seen many times but this once was different her eyes smiled with her face. "There is nothing to forgive." Her hands moved around him "I will go at your pace."  
A wicked smirk played on his lips "Then we go too slow." He turned pushing her back onto the bed. Shedding his chest plate and other garments as he approached her. He climbed naked onto the bed. Over her, catching her hands pulling them over her head and pinning them in place.  
She relinquished her self to him. He held both her hands together in one, his grip strong, she tested his resolve, pulling at him playfully, he stayed just out of her reach, his free hand exploring her. Teasing her most sensitive places, she responded to his touch, her hips grinding up to him, moaning when she wasn't able to return his affections any further than that. He enjoyed the power, relished the control she let him have over her. He pressed himself between her legs, opening her to him. Her limbs coiled around him, back arching, a sigh escaping her as he entered her finally after her sensual torment. Releasing her hands to do as they wish. They trailed through his hair, sliding either side of his face, she met his gaze, emerald green meeting peridot, he felt him self fall into her gaze, a technique he had seen her use in battle, a look that stripped a man naked an left his intentions bare before her. In that instant he felt that she knew, or at least understood a silent bond shared between them. She took his mouth and kissed him deeply, a trickle of a memory pulsed through his body. Her teeth closed around his bottom lip nibbling gently, broken by intermittent gasps as he thrust harder and faster. Her breaths became quicker, eyes closed for a moment allowing the thrill to wash over her before Rolling them both. Straddling him she lent back, riding his shaft with the fluid rocking motion of her hips, his hands gripped her thighs so hard she could see her flesh go white, the comparison between the agony and ecstasy, made the latter ten fold greater. He sat up a burst of distant feelings, knowledge from a time before the Lyrium. The closer he was to her the stronger the memories got, ensnaring her in his grasp nails raking down her back he kissed her neck. She could feel her end, the compiled sensations filling her. He seemed to respond pushing further into her, holding her tighter. Her body shuddered falling over the precipice as the wave of ecstasy washed over her. He joined her his body tensing as he came with her, burring his face in her clavicle, as the memories washed away.  
A smile graced her lips as she rested her head against his for a moment catching her breath. He began to shift, she rolled to the side to let him move. Watching him As he got up and quickly dressed.  
"Was it that bad?" She asked concerned.  
"I'm sorry it was fine." he turned from the fire place to her. "No that is insufficient. It was better than any thing I could have dreamed." He caught her eye, a small smile tugged at his lips but his eyes remained sad.  
"Your markings, they hurt don't they?" She asked sitting up, it was the last thing she wanted to do was hurt him.  
"Its not that, I began to remember my life before, just flashes." He hesitated "It's to much. This is too fast, I cannot do this." He stammered.  
"Your life before, what do you mean?"  
He sighed "I've never remembered any thing from before the ritual. There were faces words for just a moment I could recall all of it. And then it slipped away."  
"Don't you want to get your memory back?"  
"Perhaps you don't realise how upsetting this is." He growled "I've never remembered anything, and to have it all comeback in a rush only to loose it. I can't ... I can't..." The words caught in his chest, causing it to tighten around his heart.  
"We can work through this, I care about you." She pleaded rising up off the bed, making her way towards him.  
"I'm sorry, I feel like such a fool." His voice be came soft. "All I wanted was to be happy, just for a little while." Words hanging in the air as he turned from her and headed for the door "Forgive me." He added with out turning, leaving her alone in the room. 

Hawke dressed slowly. Her flesh showed the beginnings of bruises, her back protesting as cloth touched the scratches. Padding softly to the mirror she smoothed out her short dark red hair. Taking a deep breath as she looked her self in the eye.  
"Don't blame him." She told her self, choking back the hurt, settling the pleasant smile on her face. "Give, with out expectation. Accept, with out reservation." Her reflective face chanted as a mantra.  
Closing her eyes and taking one last breath before heading out into the manor. She glanced at her self momentarily. The mask of civility convincing until you looked into the wells of her deep green eyes. 

"Mistress. A letter came for you." Orana chirped her sing song voice so much like a well trained song bird. Hawke turned to her housekeeper. The young elf woman flinched her eyes growing wider in fear.  
Hawke took her hands gently "Orana you don't have to call me Mistress." Her words soft and soothing to her startled worker "You're no slave here."  
"Thank you Mis... Hawke."  
"Miss Hawke." She chuckled "Why, I almost sound like a proper lady."  
She walked with Orana down the gently curving staircase towards the study where the mail was kept.  
"Your guest left in quite a hurry." Orana noted as they walked together.  
"Yes." She said simply.  
"He was with you in the Slavers Hold, looking for the Mistress... Hadriana." She stopped "Did you find her."  
"We did."  
The young elf searched Hawkes face, there was something unsettling in how controlled she was when she spoke about the slaver. "May I ask what happened?"  
"She attempted to bargain for her life with information. Told Fenris about a sister he no longer remembers."  
"And."  
"Fenris was not impressed." Hawke added flatly.  
Orana gasped looking at Hawke her hands covering her mouth.  
"It was his choice to make." She told the girl. "He had suffered at her hand, so vengeance was his." She placed a hand on her shoulder, "I can't imagine what either of you had to go through, at the hands of those monsters." Her soft voice lowered for a moment "But it will never happen again. Not while I draw breath."  
She smiled, another attempt to put the anxious girl at ease. Before leavening her to check what notes she received.  
One letter scrawled with a familiar hand lay to one side, another with a firm clear text above it. She lifted them both turning them over in an attempt to ascertain the sender.  
Her face lit up seeing the familiar writing to be from her dear friend from Ferelden.  
'Faith are you still here?" Her mothers voice called out through the manor.  
"Yes in here." She quickly stuffed her friends letter safely in the draw and split the seal on the second. Scanning over it as her mother approached her.  
"Good I wanted to talk to you for a moment." Her mother found a spot by the study's hearth to warm herself. Hawke focused on her mother in front of the flames, ever since Fenris had mentioned the large statue above fire place looked like of of the Magisters old gods. The strange Tribal carving lit by fire had made her nervous. Leering down at her, from its vantage point.  
"What about?" She asked.  
"You seemed frosty at my mention of finding you a good husband." She left the hearth to fuss with her daughters clothes.  
"I didn't really think I was in need of a husband. Being that I have my own title now, and more than enough means."  
"Faith, I'm not talking about a man to financially support you." Leandra's hands lingered at her collar.  
"Then what?" Hawke asked innocently.  
"Continuation of the family lineage."  
"What?" Hawke's surprise was unmistakable as she pulled away from her mother. "Like children?"  
"The Elf you brought home is handsome but volatile..."  
"Fenris." She corrected cutting her mother off.  
"Are you sure about a relationship?"  
Hawke stifled the brewing fury deep with in her, plastering it with another layer of decorum "I'm assuming your saying this out of motherly love, and has nothing to do with the fact he's an Elf."  
"A person skilled in the art of killing and not much else isn't much of a person." She reached out to her, attempting to ring home the sad truth to her love blind daughter "You have a habit of adopting broken things."  
"Get to know him," Hawke pleaded with her mother catching her hand. "He's a good person, an angry person, but he has a good heart. You just have to take him slowly." She defended the man who had stormed from her room. Perhaps he was broken but that didn't mean he didn't deserve love.  
"I just want you to be careful."  
"I can handle myself mother." Her tone became clipped and no more than a growl "Not that any of those skills came from your care or tutorage, I can assure you I'm a far more dangerous beast than any man." She turned for the door.  
"You are a beast." Her mother affirmed, bringing her to pause "Never as happy as Carver or beautiful as Bethany. What ever monstrous thing in you has kept you alive, Where they couldn't survive. If I hadn't given birth to you myself, I would have wondered what dark pit you had crawled out of."  
Faith Hawke swallowed, her mothers words cutting her deeper than any knife. Turning in her gut.  
Hanging her head she turned. "I... I didn't mean." She stammered knowing she must have hurt her mother harshly with her words for her to lash out like that. "I'm not ungrateful for your worry." She stepped forward "I'm sorry Mama. I shouldn't have snapped." She caved, apologising to her only living family member attempting to make peace with the only person who still loved her.  
Her mother took her in her arms. Lowering her head onto her shoulder.  
"My girl. My silly baby girl." She cooed stroking her hair. "I understand your infatuation, but that's all it is. You will see."  
She smiled for her mother the same learned response she gave to every one. So they felt assured in their message. The same soft, peaceable smile, with the sad, mournful eyes.  
"There's a good girl." She stroked her hair. "Now didn't you have work to do?"

Hawke donned her armour ceremoniously. Shedding her comfortable clothes for the padded undergarments and plate mail. Her mind regurgitated all the words from the day.  
The accusation of Fenris being no more than an infatuation placed seeds of doubt in her heart. Clouding her own intentions, though the events of the day had escalated very quickly it was not something that hadn't been on the cards. From the moment they met. That night in the elven alienage masses of dead hunters at her feet. He sauntered in dark armour, darker mood, hair shining in the crescent moon. There had been something between them something That could only be described as a healthy distrust. They had eyed each other silently each trying to size up the other, ware them down. Neither giving in both stubborn and proud.  
She hadn't liked the deception, the bait and switch to get them there, but after travelling to Danerius' mansion, fighting off shades and rage demons. Hawke began to understand.  
She had sat with him that night. As he claimed the mansion for his own. Lighting a fire in the great hearth, they sat on broken chairs and half torn cushions, in amongst the ruin. She had gotten to know him, realised he wore his heart on his sleeve and would talk candidly with her. She had never had feelings for man like that before. He took a swig of his former owners best wine, and smashed the bottle against the far wall.  
Hawke hadn't flinched, she had in her own way understood the need for violent expression. She never forgot that beneath her own surface anger lurked. A vile temper that hurt those she cared for and scared off many more. She knew how it felt to be that raw nerve, sensitive to every look, and word. Some how she felt that quiet knowledge helped.  
Was that the only reason why she had taken interest in him? Because they were underneath it all the same beast.  
She let her self out of the manor and into the afternoon sun. There was no point in mulling over these things. Unless Fenris decided he was ready, the relationship was dead in the water.

Clanking across the Nobel streets of Hightown her usual team of misfits came to join her, as she gathered supplies for their new quest. Her next stop was the bone pit looking for Darkstone to help Anders rid himself of his "Justice", she wasn't a fan of the Mage, perhaps it was his greasy demeanour, or the way he and Fenris always fought, but she wasn't about to let any one walk around possessed when they had a chance to be free. Work could be just the thing to take her mind off everything else  
As she tread through the market her friends at her back, she saw a familiar head of brunette hair. A more than familiar set of Ferelden armour, with a great sword slung over one shoulder. Suddenly the letter made sense it was Arianne hand she had read, she had left Ferelden. Her best friend had come to join her in the free marches. Excitedly she ran across the markets loosing her Hammer as she went. Bringing the weapon over her head and down with force. The Warrior woman stepped back freeing her own great sword as she dodged the attack, Hawkes hammer shattering the cobbles stones. Arianna swung her sword across her body, before Hawke could lift the head of her weapon. She swung around the Handle leaving the head on the stones using the pommel to block the strike. From that position she kicked wide landing it on her friends well armoured well ready shoulder. She stumbled back, Hawke placed her feet and lifted the Hammer, swinging to towards the woman's left shoulder. Her own broadsword careering at breakneck speed towards Hawke.  
A hairs breath from contact each woman stopped.  
"Arianne!" Hawke exclaimed the excitement cracking her voice. She embraced the taller woman, their armour ringing  
"Hawke, you never did watch you left side."  
"I never had to, you were always there." She laughed. "And now here you are again."  
"Did you not get my letter? I explained everything there."  
"I must confess I saw the letter today, but I have had a few things on my mind." She apologised.  
"Did lover boy come back after his temper tantrum at the shavers hold." Isabella quipped  
Hawke shot her a dark look, a joke it may have been there was nothing funny about it.  
"Lover boy?" Arianne raised an eye brow. "Look at you getting all friendly with the locals."  
"He's not... I mean we're not." Hawke fumbled through the words.  
Her friend interrupted giving her the vocabulary she needed "it's complicated?"  
As if on cue Fenris quietly joined the team. He drew no attention himself and said nothing about their new addition.  
"Not that I don't love your gossip Hawke, but we have a job to do." Anders whinged.  
"All right." Hawke sighed she looked up into the brown eyes of her friend a smile playing on her lips. "We go into the belly of the bone pit. Feel like a little fun?"  
"Just like old times?" Her Friend asked  
"Just like."

 

***  
"Are you sure about Fenris? He seems more like a wild dog than a man." Anders voice echoed through the cavern drowning out the sound of ten sets of boots crunching through dirt and dead bones. Picking out the dark stone deposits.  
"I trust him with my life." Hawke answered. Her voice soft but firm as iron.  
"With no hesitation?" He pressed  
"With no hesitation." She reiterated attempting not to lose her temper with the Mage. "For years now he has been at my side, and been nothing but furiously loyal.  
"Furious is right."  
"Talk about me like I am not here Mage and I'll ..." Fenris glowered.  
Hawke silenced him with a hand on his chest, stopping his onslaught.  
She stepped up towards the Mage her voice no more than a whisper as she spoke into his ear. "Fe is furious but I assure you I am worse. Continue to push me on this subject and you will know which of us you should be afraid of."  
As she spoke Anders eyes wandered from her to the Elf standing behind her, behind his usual look of disdain, was something else, something sweeter, something deeper, the red cuff on his wrist was new, then it dawned on him "You two?" He gasped "You two ... Oh now I understand the favouritism."  
Fenris looked away for a moment, Anders looked back to Hawke in disbelief. "Really Hawke?"  
Hawkes eyes never left Anders, her threat still stood. With out an answer from her, Anders shook his head and returned to gathering his ingredients.  
"A clever dwarf, a sexually flamboyant pirate, a love sick elf and an apostate. You always travel with such a colourful crew?" Arianna mused trying to break the tension.  
"Well I have to try make up for the hole you left in my life. You forgot we also have the Captian of the guard and a Dailish blood Mage" Hawke retorted.  
"My, my you have gone up in the world." Arianna chuckled.  
Quickly her laughs were cut short, a strange hissing in the air. Hawke saw her friend eyes, she had heard it too.  
"Anders." She shouted "Hurry it up."  
"One more, all I need is one..." His sentence cut short as spiders the size of horses descended the walls. The queen spider a giantess of her kind in front of the Mage.  
Arianna and Hawke took up position, the taller brunette sticking close to her left side.  
The old friends gave each other one quick look.  
"Just like old times,"  
"Just like."  
They leaped forward. Seamlessly they worked in unison. Arianna the stronger of the two taking the point. Hacking, slashing, delivering the heavy blows. While Hawke kept her free to attack. Fenris launched in to a group of spiders quickly laying them to waste but feeling vulnerable. So often Hawke was at his side. Two soldiers fighting back to back keeping each other safe.  
Hawke saw Varric groan, a smaller spider coming to close for him to attack. She saw him faultier. A high placed whistle got his attention and she threw him an elf root potion, enough to get him running again, as she broke formation and cut down the arachnid. She offered him a hand up as she watched the party whittle down their adversaries.  
The queen was proving a problem, Anders could slow it with his magic, nothing they seemed to do seem to make any headway with her.  
With nothing smaller to preoccupy him Fenris turned to help the obnoxious Mage. He swung his axe hard and wide and buried it in one of the eight legs.  
The creature screeched, turning its attention to the elf. She lashed out. Legs flailed passed him swiping at him. She screeched again this time rising up bearing her mandibles and the long vicious poison tipped fangs. Her body slammed down next to him, he just managed to sidestep out of the way, but lost his footing. She rose for a second assault faster and lunged forward, this time with her fangs. He snatched back his axe and braced. Expecting at any moment to feel the point of her deadly teeth in his flesh.  
He heard a heavy thud, the clang of armour taking a direct hit. The spider queens attack never came. He looked up, and saw Hawke was face to face with the monster. One fang had broken off hitting her chest plate. Hammer thrown aside gauntleted hands locked the Palp in place and she pinned the head of the beast against her.  
"You alright?" She asked through gritted teeth.  
"Yes."  
"Then hit her! Hit her hard." She shouted. The pinch in her armour was getting stronger. The spider queen battered her with what free arms it had, but Hawke didn't let go. If she had one talent, it was she was as stubborn as a mule and hard to knock out.  
"Anders a little fire would be nice." She barked. As the fire erupted from his staff, the beast began to shake. Quivering from the intense fear and pain. Hawke almost felt sorry for it as she locked eyes with it. "You attacked us," she reasoned more to herself than the many eyes of the monster. An explosion ripped through the beasts body, Hawke was thrown back, hitting the ground with a heavy thud, clattering inside her armour despite the padding.  
She looked up to see the great body of the spider queen, hunks missing from its torso.  
Varric offered her a hand up as she had earlier.  
"Combustion grenade." He said answering her stunned expression "You're welcome."  
"Couldn't have done it a little sooner?" She asked,  
the dwarf laughed "Hawke always so demanding of me."  
Anders collected his last sample and the team gratefully made for the outside world.

Hawke's armour rang with a clang as her friends gauntlet Clapped her on her back. She stumbled forward a little, forgetting the strength the battle hardened woman possessed. Letting her hammer sink in the mud out side the bone pits entrance she ran her hand over the dent the spiders fangs had left in her gorget. She felt a pinch under her armour, excusing it away with the furrow.  
"Good to see you haven't lost your edge." She chortled as she tested her arms manoeuvrability.  
Wiping the sweat that gathered at her brow, pushing the stray brunette locks away from her forehead. Arianna shifted her weight on her cocked hips, she returned her great sword to her back. Smiling breathlessly from the battle. "Good to see the Free Marches haven't made you soft either."  
She turned to her friend's companions, each collecting themselves after the hard fight. "Where did you manage to find this lot? The Deep Roads? They make the Grey Wardens look like Mabari pups."  
"Ain't nothing in the Deep Roads but blight and pain." Hawke answered her friend.  
"And a life times worth of coin." Varric laughed interjecting  
"I only survived them because of this lot. I hate to say it though, but they all found me." She exclaimed "Though not all of them got quite what they expected."  
Her eyes slid over to the lanky elf. Moving up his form to make eye contact. For a moment they looked at each other, shyly beginning the dance anew before looking away. Fenris busing himself with cleaning his axe. Hawke attempting the calm the blush clawing its way out through her cheeks.  
"None of us got what we expected." Isabella added dryly. "Was she any different in Ferelden?"  
Briefly noting the exchange of looks between her old friend and the tattooed elf. Arianna replied. "Well her taste has certainly changed." Her attention flicking to Fenris as he looked up from his weapon, eyes slightly wide.  
"You should close that mouth before I permanently silence you." His eyes had returned to their narrowed state, brows creased in a frown.  
"Children, no squabbling." Hawke scolded gently putting an arm around Arianne. "We have some catching up to do. Perhaps over a pint?"  
She was feeling warm, a drink could perhaps quench her slowly growing thirst and the social lubricant could hopefully ease a few tensions.  
"Or a few." Varric chimed in "You're paying Hawke."  
Hawke laughed, "Of course we can't really ask the refugee to pay." 

They began the track towards the hanged man.  
"Has my taste really changed?" She asked her friend as their boots tracked parallel prints through the dirt. "I didn't realise I had a type."  
The smile on Arianne's face only grew. "You must remember the head of the Guards eldest."  
Hawke laughed sheepishly forgetting how astute her friend was, she was glad more in her home town weren't. Ferelden was not as accepting about some things as Kirkwall was. "And I though I was so clever. Mother and Bethany were never the wiser." She sighed "It took weeks for me to get the courage to speak to them. Even then I was about as sensual as brick."  
It was good talking about old times. Happier times, times before the blight, before she had to leave her dear friend and home behind,  
"You seem to forget that I was the one who covered for you whenever you ran off somewhere." The sword-wielding woman smirked, adding a little more sashay to her walk. It felt good to be back by her friend's side. She always knew Hawke would make a great leader some day.  
"Hawke, how come I've never heard this story before?" The dark-haired rogue pouted. "I'm hurt you would keep something this juicy from me."  
Catching Fenris in her peripheral vision, she gave her friend a wry and knowing look before answering the rogue. "Perhaps I will fill you in, but when we have a moment alone. Or I've had enough liquor."

Groaning the heavy wood door announced their arrival at the Hanged Man. Rough as the pub was, it was not unfamiliar with a band of filth and blood stained guests. It had been host to more than its fair stair of brawls a few of which being Hawkes fault.  
She signalled for Arianna to follow the seasoned guests down the back, where a glorious fire burned in the hearth. While she herself grabbed the first round. She tipped the staff generously, after all it was all looted money.  
Arianne made herself cosy, seating herself next to the roaring fire.  
"Ah, I could get used to this." She sighed admiring the decor.  
"Well if you're looking for a place to live, you're out of luck." Varric joined her, the rest if the troupe filling in.  
"I will not have my dearest friend living in a debaucherous place like this!" Hawke explained followed by the serving girl with the first round. "She will come with me at the manor. There is plenty of space."  
"Be still my beating heart." Varric said "Two lovely girls sharing a home."  
"Maybe I could join?" Isabella interjected her voice dripping with honey, "Three of us plus your lovely house servant?"  
"Timorous wee Orana?" At that Hawke had to laugh "Isabella you should pick on some one your own size."  
"Is that an offer Hawke?"  
Fenris snorted and choked on his drink. Hawke was reduced into a fit of giggles. A heat beginning to take hold of her senses.  
Arianne watched the conversation devolve into laughs. She was glad that Faith had found happiness after what she had lived through. Happiness and success. Maybe this was the city for it.  
"Alright, I will join you at the manor," She told her friend, "But, I won't mooch off of a friend forever."  
She took a sip of her drink. Relishing the cold ale as it slipped down her throat.  
"I expect I'll put you right to work. Walking my dog and answering my letters." Hawk managed to say calming her fits.  
Her face had gone pink, heat seeping from her chest to her fingertips. She lay her gauntlets on the table so she could nurse the cold ale in front of her. Holding it to her flushed cheeks.  
"Though the dog is more like a horse." She told her friend "and he thinks he's smarter than most people."  
"He is smarter than most people." Fenris muttered quietly from the back  
Arianne perked up. "You have a dog? Wondrous!" She took a gulp of her ale. "They make such lovely companions. Much better than cats, don't you agree?"  
She couldn't help but notice Hawke seemed off. Arianne thought about it; the Hawke she had known had changed, maybe this wasn't unusual for her.  
"I had a cat once." She whispered "fowl tempered creature. But I like all animals."  
"The crankier the better? Right Hawke." Anders finally spoke up. He had remained surprisingly quiet since his Darkstone had been collected.  
Fenris moved, standing quickly bumping the table. Anders rose to the challenge. Taking the mages shoulder, as the closer of the two, she pushed him back into his seat roughly. "Careful Anders some one will think your jealous."  
"Just like you, Hawke. Making friends wherever you go." Arianna gave Anders a playful nudge with her elbow but he didn't seem impressed.  
When that didn't work, she offered him the rest of her ale.  
"No thanks." He held a hand out in a way that would have been polite if not for the bitterness in his voice. "I know when I'm not welcome."  
Anders stood and started walking away.  
Arianne shrugged. "His loss." She gulped down the rest of her drink.  
"Uptight, winy Mage." Faith muttered under her breath. Leaning heavily into the seat.  
"So you up for joining our merry band. If this is what you get to look forward to."  
Varric downed the last of his drink whipping his mouth on his hand "on the up side the ales always cold, and the conversation is usually better."  
***

Heat had crawled from her chest to her feet, into her stomach and now the fingers of fire were tiptoeing up her spine and into her brain. She stumbled through Lowtown, her steps becoming slower. The world around her spun. Buildings twisting in her vision. She made it to the Hightown steps before she had to sit to regain her composer.  
Soft footsteps echoed in her delirium and came to rest before her. She saw familiar feet, the only things standing still in the swaying world.  
"Hawke," Fenris's gravelly voice was unmistakable "Are you alright?"  
"I'm fine." She snapped making to stand "I just drunk a little." As she attempted to make a step her knees collapsed under her. His quick strong arms wrapped around her waist and stopped her from falling.  
"You can't be drunk. You didn't even finish your first pint." He told her, his voice stern "I have seen you drink dwarfs under the table."  
"Bad day then." She grumbled pushing away from him and trudging slowly and carefully up the steps and into Hightown market.  
Fenris followed her, a dutiful eye locked on the staggering figure. By herself In this state she was an easy offering to any passing low life's.  
again she faltered this time landing on the ground resting on her hands and knees.  
"Do you want my help yet?" He asked her.  
She looked up at him her eyes red, her face furrowed with pain. She raised a hand. He helped her to her feet and pulled her in close, half walking half carrying her to her estate. 

The house was silent, when he opened the door. A fire crackled in the main hearth as it always did. Hawkes hound looked up and wined at him. Coming over to sniff his masters clammy hand. As he made his way towards her room Orana poked her head out of the servants quarters and gasped.  
She ran to Hawke worry clearly tearing across her face.  
"Her skins like fire!" She exclaimed taking her hand "I'll fetch water and a cloth." She flitted off as quickly as she had flitted in. Leaving Fenris to deal with Hawke who was growing more limp as time progressed.  
He got her to the bed. Sitting her on the edge holding her up enough to assess the damage on her armour.  
Her chest plate was dinged but not beyond repair, the metal caving in as much as if a hammer would hit it. The gorget that protected her throat and collar bone had been chipped, a nick from the top, but no extra markings as if the fang wasn't deflected by the armour. His heart began to sink as he looked for any evidence that the tooth had missed the one tiny opening and harmlessly glanced off.  
Finding none, he hurriedly began unclasping and buckling the parts of the armour to see if his deductions were correct.  
Orana arrived with a bucket of cold water, placing it next to the bed she helped hold Hawke while Fenris pulled of the last layer of padding and discarded it with the rest.  
"Oh no." Orana's whisper carried through the room.  
The spider queen had gotten one bite in. The graze though not deep enough to cause alarm, had become infected with the monsters venom. The one lucky fang had slid between Hawkes flesh and armour running down over top of her jugular and lodged in her collar bone.  
"You stupid girl." Fenris whispered guilt beginning to weigh down his heart. "Why did you save me."  
Orana's alarm subsided quicker, she wrung out the cloth folded it neatly and put it on Hawkes sweating brow.  
"It's Miss Hawkes way." She answered Fenris' mumblings. "Saving people and the like." She began tucking the woman into the bed. "It's like asking a fish not to swim, asking miss Hawke not to help people."  
She took a second cloth from the bucket and began to carefully wash the wound.  
"Her Mage frien,d he is a healer. Perhaps we should fetch him."  
"No, no Anders." Hawke protested her words slurring together "I hate Anders. Whiny blond upstart."  
Fenris would have laughed if he could of, but seeing the elf maiden tend to the suppurating mess Hawkes throat was becoming, worry ate at him.  
Orana threw the cloth away, and grabbed the one back off Hawkes head dunking it and cooling. Wringing it out she pushed it into Fenris' hand.  
"You stay. I'll fetch him." She gathered up her skirts and padded away. Timorous wee Orana was far more collected than people gave her credit for.  
Tenderly he dabbed the sweat from Hakwes brow. Sitting quietly on the edge of the bed, watching as her face screwed up with a mixture of pain and confusion. She murmured softly, struggling against the venom cursing through her veins, Eyelids flickering. Fenris' mind jumped to dark conclusions, fearing she would die.  
"Faith." He whispered holding her hand in his own, feeling the heat in her skin as he kissed her fingertips "Don't leave me. I need you."

Faith Hawke was in Ferelden, in her little house with her mother and father. Her arm was heavily bandaged, a sword and what was left of a shield lay in the corner of the room. She was young, she knew she was young, a teen at best, she hadn't used a sword and shield for years.  
Her father glowered at her, he always seemed to tower above her, the only similarities they shared the dark red almost auburn hair and emerald eyes which burned into the truest depths of a persons soul. The twins had been banished to their room. Leaving her alone to face the disappointment of their father.  
"Papa." She pleaded "Papa please don't look at me like that." Her arm ached, she held her good hand under it, cradling it in the sling he had made her after setting the bone. His kindness had ended there.  
"I'm disappointed in you Faith" He said his voice deathly quiet,  
"What why?" She exclaimed shocked,  
"As the oldest it's your responsibility to keep your siblings safe." He elaborated leaning on his staff.  
"Papa I did. I tried, I warned Carver away, he wouldn't listen. Thought he could take a cavern full of dragonlings on by himself. He didn't think that where there are dragonlings there are dragons." Her voice cracked with desperation trying to explain to her father.  
"Then you failed."  
"Failed?" She shouted "He came out in one piece! Me... Look at me, that's my shield arm Papa. I have a tourney in a week. It was going to be my break I was going to...."  
"What?" He interrupted his deep voice cutting her off "Impress some Templar Knight and get whisked away to the chantry."  
"I thought I could be a warden," She explained trying to quell the fears her father, the apostate, had of her joining the order. "Anything, to give me a chance to see the world. To be free."  
"You will see enough of the world in time child." He snapped "Perhaps this was a blessing in disguise. How can you expect to protect the realm if you can't protect your family."  
She bowed her head stammering he was right. The darkness enveloped her, allowing only enough light so she could see she was wading through blight filled bodies. Her own flesh covered in charred remains of people. Her tears the only thing smearing the soot. Inside her mind was screaming. She was panicking she knew she was. A terrified mind had no place with in a leader. She steeled herself and then the ogre hit.

Hawke screamed, fighting an unseen foe. Fenris tried to calm her, stroking her hair, trying to hold her arms stopping her from hurting her self. She cried her brothers name, pleaded with the gods.  
Her mind had gone the way of the blight in Ferelden and what ever horrors she had lived through.

He heard the foot steps at the door before he announced himself, the Mage wasn't a cautious walker. His foot falls were heavy despite his light attire. As he peered through the door Fenris grabbed him. His hand dug into the collar of the blond man pulling him into the room and pushing him up against the solid stone walls.  
"Mage this is your fault!" He shouted. Slamming him against the wall.  
"And this isn't going to get us anywhere." Anders replied dryly,  
Fenris swallowed his anger. Reluctantly letting him go.  
Anders moved over to Hawke, inspecting the wound, touching her fevered forehead.  
"Well heal her." Fenris demanded.  
"I can't." Anders said plainly, beginning to bind the wound. "There is no antidote for this venom and its too far gone. She has to wait it out. If the fever breaks and she she survives the night. She will be fine." He stood walking back towards the door.  
"If? IF!" Fenris barked "What do you mean If."  
"Be thankful it wasn't a corrupt spider. There is no surviving the blight unless she wants to become a warden."  
"Be thankful I have more pressing things to worry about than ripping your head from your shoulders." Fenris growled "Get out. Just get out." 

Hawkes episodes had calmed down. She seemed to be sleeping though not all together peacefully. Fenris had given up pacing and left the room for a second to collect himself a chair. He wanted to keep vigil with out disturbing Hawke.  
"Oh you're back." Her mother said leaving the hearth walking past him as he collected one of the armchairs from the study.  
"Hawke is unwell." Was all he could say as he was hit with her obvious dislike.  
"Orana told me as much." She paused locking him with cold eyes. "It still brings to wonder what you're doing here."  
"She may not survive the night. The fever has gripped her mind." He looked at this woman that would be Hawkes mother "Some one should be with her."  
The older woman scoffed. "a fever will not take that girl."  
Fenris was unsure if she was overly confidant or almost disappointed. "The maker chose to take my sweet ones away, but left her because he didn't want to put up with her sheer force of will."  
There was nothing he could say, grabbing the plush chair by its arms he picked it up.  
"If you value your life you won't get too close." She added as he walked back into Hawkes room. He cooled the cloth again, and dabbed the tears from her cheeks before settling himself down in the chair at the end of her bed.

He must have nodded off because he awoke with a start as Hawke gasped and sat up. She was franticly looking around through unseeing eyes. He crawled up the bed to her cupping her face in his hands he pressed his forehead to hers. She didn't make a noise at first, just stared at a point passed him. Until slowly her eyes came into focus.  
"Fenris?" She asked her hand touching his. Her voice weak.  
"I am with you."  
"They're dead. They're all dead." She repeated, slowly becoming a whisper.  
"Not all." He told her lying her back down, thinking that she was still dreaming.  
She grabbed his arm, her burning fingers like a vice around his wrist.  
"Don't leave." She said fearing he was moving away. Darker impulses were taking over, the deep seeded survival instinct that saved her from the dragon and the ogre was rising. She wanted to push him a way, she wanted him to leave for fear of the darkness reaching out to renew her life force from his. Yet in his presence she felt she could control it, continue to keep it under wraps "Please.."  
He obeyed taking up a spot next to her in the grand four poster bed. Gently he prised her hand off his, laying it back across her body. Noticing for the first time the long haggard scar that ran the length of her forearm.  
"What's this?" He asked her making idol conversation while she still seemed alert enough to do so. She turned her arm over before slowly blinking eyes.  
"This Fenris is punishment." She took a breath formulating the sentences in her fevered mind "We all bare marks of our past, just not all are beautiful." Her hand lazily trailed up his arm for a moment following the line of the Lyrium.  
"What wrong deserved that price?"  
"Lack of vigilance." She rubbed the scar "Carver wanted to explore a cave. I told him no. He convinced Bethany to distract me." Her voice trailed off as she blinked slowly. "I heard the screams. I didn't even realise where he had gone." She sighed "it was a dragon, first one I had ever seen. Not as big as you might think but big enough to a sixteen year old."  
"You fought a dragon when you were sixteen." Fenris reiterated.  
"It wasn't so much of a fight, I told Bethany to grab Carver and run. Damn thing set fire to my shield and nearly took off my arm."  
"You father was a Mage. Why did he not heal you?"  
"Ah." She exclaimed "There in lies the punishment."  
"Mages." He scoffed "Think its their right to dictate the world."  
Hawke chuckled "Not mages, just my father, he was strict but not unjust."  
She sighed "I thought my life was over. I had a small infection while it was healing, and it must have weakened the bone, after a month I went back to training, I could lift a shield but not take a hit. I was looking at becoming a tailor, or a bar wench."  
Fenris laughed at the notion of Hawke being anything but Hawke,  
"Arianna found me one day and handed me a hammer." She looked up at him "It's a funny thing, you don't always see the weapon of your salvation straight away."  
"You two have been friends a long time then?" He asked quietly.  
"The longest of times."  
"I shall keep my jealousy in check next time she takes my place by you in battle. Because it was her place I stole at your side."  
Hawke looked up at him, the red in her face made the green of her eyes glitter "Are we still friends at least? My life is richer for you being in it, I couldn't imagine a day With out."  
"At the least." He told her "Hawke ... Faith, I am with you." 

Fenris' eyes snapped open as the door moved. It was a quiet movement he almost thought it was Orana. He was surprised to see a brunette head peak through the door.  
Nodding in her direction Arianna silently asked Hawkes status. He looked at the sleeping form of Hawke against his chest. Her fever had subsided, taking with it the nightmares letting her sleep soundly, after a night of mental torment.  
He slipped from her and joined her friend at the door closing it behind him.  
"She's better." He said his voice horse from lack of sleep. "The worst is behind us. No doubt she will be up trying to save the world later on today."  
Arianna chuckled "You know Hawke well then?"  
He eyed the tall human suspiciously for a moment, before realising there was no underlying maliciousness in her comment.  
"It was good of you to help her." She said sadly "You were the only one who noticed anything was wrong."  
"I wouldn't abandon her, just because" he paused thinking of the words.  
"It's complicated?" Arianna finished "The others were gossiping after you left. Apparently you two have been dancing round the mulberry bush for quite some time now."  
Fenris clenched his teeth and looked away for a minute not knowing how to react.  
She held up her hands. "Your Business is your Business." She told him "I don't go for gossip. That's my best friend in there an I'm just making sure she's in good hands." She smiled her big brown eyes filling her gesture with warmth. "You're a good man."  
His brow furrowed and he began to stalk off.  
"Your not staying till she wakes?"  
"Best not." He replied "Your here now." He said solemnly.  
"I'm not replacing you,"  
"I feel like perhaps I was replacing you."  
***

Hawke sat up, her mouth was dry, her head had a dull ache. Arianna sat at the foot of her bed in a chair reading a book.  
"Why the vigil?" Hawke croaked.  
"Didn't you hear?" Her friend laughed "You were going to die. Had a huge fever, rambled on about ogres and dragons, so Fenris tells any way."  
Hawke rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "He was here?" She threw her legs over the bed wrapping a blanket around her shoulders.  
"All night."  
"I thought I had dreamed it." She touched her throat, figures running over the bandage.  
Shaking her head Arianna asked "How did you miss being bitten by the Spider Queen herself?"  
Hawke shrugged, "All I felt was a pinch. Though it was a dent in my armour."  
"You must have skin like an ogre!"  
"And the constitution to match." She added dryly.  
The women were interrupted by an agitated conversation, Hawke heard her uncles voice and stood.  
"You sure you want to face the world. You still look a little like death."  
Hawke moved to her wardrobe to quickly dress and make herself presentable. As she straightened her self in the mirror she instantly understood what Arianna was talking about. Her fair skin which normally had a rosy hue, was devoid of colour and bordering on grey.  
"You never know to corpulent look might catch on." She laughed.

"By the maker Faith what's wrong with you?" Her uncle gasped as she and Arianna descended the stairs.  
"I'm a little under the weather." She lied  
"Is your mother also unwell?" He asked  
Hawke frowned "I don't believe so, why?"  
"She was suppose to meet me this morning, and I haven't seen hide nor hair of her."  
"She's a big girl I'm sure she just forgot to mention that she went to market or something." Hawke patted her uncle on the shoulder. "Arianna and I will head out and look. I doubt she's gone far."  
"Perhaps she has a suitor?" Orana chirped "After all some one left her some beautiful white lilies."  
Hawkes heart plummeted through her feet, her face going cold with fear.  
"What's wrong." Arianna queried fearing she was having a relapse of the venoms sickness.  
"White lilies?" She swallowed the lump in her throat. "When we you suppose to meet Uncle?"  
"For Morningtea. Why what's wrong."  
Searching the clock for hope, Hawke got none. It was late afternoon, her mother had been gone for at least six hours. She turned on her heal to collect her armour.  
"Hawke what aren't you telling us." Arianna called after her.  
"There's a serial killer, he has been abducting women for some time now. Every time I have missed him, every time he's been a step a head of me." She slammed her fist on the stair rail.  
"You think he has Leandra?" Arianna could sense the fury brewing inside her friend. The pain and fear of her mothers kidnapping being repurposed into an anger that could bring down kingdoms.  
"I know it."

Together Arianna and Hawke searched Darktown and Lowtown, scouring the vile streets for any leads.  
"Oh yeah," a street urchin answered Arianna's questions with a dirty face and worse attitude. "I seen some one that looks like that."  
"Tell me child where." Arianna pleaded.  
"Make it worth my while." The child demanded.  
"How about being able to walk." Hawke growled picking the child up by his collar so his feet dangled towards the ground. "That enough incentive for you."  
"Hawke!" Arianna scolded. brining Hawke back to her senses. She placed the child back on the ground. "I know your worried but this is not how we do things!"  
Hawke stepped back allowing he friend to take the reigns. She pressed some coins into the boys hand.  
"That all? She could have ruptured something."  
Arianna sighed and gave him a few more. "That better?"  
"He was a man, with hair and a nose. Nice clothes but they were stained from all the blood."  
"You little." Hawke made a lunge for the child. But didn't attack Arianna's hand blocking her path, scaring the urchin  
"ok, ok they went towards the foundry that's all I know." He scurried back into the underbelly of Lowtown.  
Arianna turned on Hawke. "What was that?" She demanded. "Since when do you threaten children. You have never been a thug."  
Hanging her head, whipping her brown Hawke whispered "It's my mother." She looking paler by the minute.  
Her friend put a hand behind her head and pulled her in for a hug. "I know. But that behaviour won't get us any where. You can do this." She paused "We can do this." She clapped her back firmly to reinforce the statement. "To the foundry."  
Hawke swallowed her anger and fear. Putting on her face of calm resolve she made for the foundry.

Peering through the gloom, Hawke saw that the thick mess she had stepped in was blood. Slowly seeping into the dirt floor. She loosed her hammer from her back. Together they tread carefully, wary of any traps.  
"By the maker!" Arianna gasped looking to the only light source in the room.  
Glittering around a beautiful painting, candles threw up an eery light in the back corner of the room. Flowers produced a sickly sweet scent of their slow decay.  
"The woman." Faith said her voice quiet so as not to disturb the hush, "She looks like mother." She approached the shrine. Held captive by its horror. She heard paper crunch behind her. Arianna screwed up a note in her hand. Her face warped in disgust.  
"What is it?" Hawke asked.  
Arianna only shook her head.  
"Tell me what it is." She demanded her voice bouncing off the walls.  
Again her friend denied her, tucking the note away in her breast plate. "It is best for you not to know."  
A Mage entered drawn towards their voices. He came to stop before a slumped figure, on a chair. It had been so still up until his entrance neither woman noticed it was there.  
"I was wondering when you would show up." He spoke slowly with a nasally drawl. "Leandra was so sure you would come for her."  
"Where is she?" Hawke kept her voice low and as controlled as she could, with the stench of death in the air.  
The Mage smiled, his thin lips dragging out and upward to create a serpentine grin.  
"You will never understand my purpose, your mother was chosen because she was special, and now she is apart of something." He paused "Greater."  
"Spare me your demented rambling. Where is she." Hawke growled her knuckles turning white as she gripped the handle of her hammer.  
"She is here, she is waiting for you."  
The figure in white moved. Like a marionette stilted, as if the person wasn't in control of all of their joints.  
"I have done the impossible I have touched the face of the maker and lived. Do you know what the strongest force in the universe is? Love. I placed her together from memory, I found her eyes, her skin, her delicate figure, and at last her face... Oh this beautiful face. I've searched far and wide to find you again beloved, and no force on earth will part us." The pieced together flesh of various woman turned from the chair to face Arianna and Hawke.  
Heart dropping in her chest Hawkes emotions turned to steal, her eyes narrowed turning them into emerald slits of focus. The only thing she saw was the Mage.  
The smell of sulphur permeated the air as the grounded separated to birth shades, rage and desire demons. All bound to the will of the one blood Mage. The one man who had killed Hawkes mother for her face and the likeness it shared with another woman.  
Fire erupted licking her amour singeing her hair. Arianna leapt forward to help her friend. Together they cut a line to the Mage. Pushing back his demons and shades.  
Finally chest heaving, muscles screaming Hawke stood above the man that would be her mothers killer.  
"I have touched..." He began but never finished as Hawke's hammer came down onto his face, rendering his head flat into the dirt floor. 

The white figure staggered to wards her. Her eyes lifeless despite the movement of the body. She collapsed as she reached Hawkes arms  
"Mama?" She cried her voice being reduced to nothing more that the terrified shout of a child as she held what was left of her mother in her arms.  
"There is nothing that can be done, his magic was keeping her alive." Arianna stood behind her friend. Her stomach was filled with bile at the actions of the crazed blood Mage, but loyalty to her friend through the next few harrowing moments kept her stoic.  
"I knew you would come." Leandra sighed reaching out to touch Hawkes cheek.  
"You know me" She laughed fighting back the tears "I always save the day." She paused choking on her own words, "If you hang on a little longer, I can..."  
"Don't fret darling." Her mother interrupted softly. "That man would have kept me trapped here, but now I am free." She smiled "I get to see Caver again, baby Bethany and your father, but you'll be here alone. You were the one that could look after your self."  
"I should have watched over you more closely, I should have have been there. Mama I'm so sorry."  
"My little girl has become so strong. I love you, you always made me so proud." She smiled as the life trickled out of her eyes and she hung limp in Hawke's arms.  
Hawke stood carrying the body that her mother had inhabited last, the patchwork woman, a few tears streaked through the blood and they finally left the foundry.  
***

Numb, was the only feelings Hawke had. She made arrangements for her mothers funeral, that day. Her temper had cooled, leaving only a cold civility that left Hawke functional.  
"Hawke." Anders approached her as she pushed open her front door. "I haven't seen you all day."  
"I had a personal matter to attend to." She spoke quietly, leaving the door open for Anders to follower her and Arianna in side. She patted her hound who sat waiting patiently by the fire. He whined nudging her hand knowing full well something was wrong with his master.  
"Well if that is all dealt to, I still have the matter of the chantry for you too help me with."  
The dog growled at the blond Mage. Putting its self between its master and him as she lent against the fire place.  
"Of course, it is on the list." She waved her hand, her words robbed of conviction.  
"This is a matter of great urgency." The Mage demanded taking a step forwarded.  
The mighty mabari barked,  
"Hey." Arianna interjected her remark meant as much for Anders as the hound. "Ease up," the pup obeyed padding over to Hawke liking the hand that hung apathetically at her side.  
Anders eyed the brunette unconvinced that he should drop the matter. "You don't seem to understand."  
"No." Arianna cut him off. "You don't, the last two days have been more than hell, and part of that was your fault. Give her time."  
"If your talking about the poison that..."  
Arianna pointed to the door with a firm gauntleted hand "Out. Now." She bellowed,  
The Mage huffed, sulking out of the house, giving Gamlen a dark look As he entered.  
"We'll." he asked seeing the two young women home. "Did you find her?"  
Looking up from the fire place Hawke spoke. "Uncle I'm sorry." She shook her head "She's gone."  
Gamlens face dropped, his eyebrows knotting together.  
"You were right" He murmured "about the flowers and everything, I... I can't believe she's gone."  
"I was too late" Hawke told him bending down to her hound. Her eyes distant filling with the guilt of her mothers death.  
"So your to blame," her uncle shouted attacking her with his grief.  
"Yes." Came the flat defeated reply.  
"If you have been quicker"  
"Yes"  
"Or stronger you could have..."  
"Stop this!" Arianna cried "You are causing your niece great pain in a time of great pain. Would Leandra want that? No, funeral arraignments have been made, now go home and grieve for your sister, as Faith will grieve for her mother." She led him to the door.  
"Why?" He asked her "why Leandra that's all I wanted to know."  
Arianna swallowed, remembering the shrine, the notes about how he preserved the body parts. "A very sick man, was trying to bring his wife back to life." She couldn't bear to give him any more details than that.  
"Was it her fault?"  
Shaking her head Arianna answered "Faith did all she could. And in the end she was there to say goodbye, the fault lies with the murder."

Arianna returned to the hearth. Her friend sat starring into the fire her dogs head on her lap. The heat had given her a little colour in her other wise still plaid face. Her eyebrows furrowed beneath her fringe. Faith had hardly recovered from one near death experience. Placing a strong reassuring hand on her un armoured shoulder Arianna spoke softly. "Faith why don't you go to bed?"  
She looked up and smiled "I'm fine Arianna, I practically slept all day."  
The brunette knew better than to trust her smiles, "I'm pulling rank, you are to go to bed now."  
"How can you pull rank on me in my own home?"  
"I'm taller. Take Morfudd with you." She nodded to the hound, who looked at his master.  
The mention if the dog seemed to gather some response from Hawke. "No my furred friend. You're a war hound not a lap dog. And with my sickness you have been cooped up here to long."  
"Then I will walk him, let him chew on some bandits for exercise if you take a moment." She slapped her thigh and turned for the door, Morfudd looked between his master and her friend until Hawke nodded allowing him to chase after his human escort eagerly. Passing Orana on the way out Arianna gave her strict instructions not to let any one in. Missions could wait.

Returning to her bed room Faith Hawke sat on the edge of the bed. The numbness that had got her through the ordeal was subsiding, grief was churning into rage in her chest getting ready to erupt like magma breaking free of the earths crust. She screwed up her face forcing the tears back down. Lashing out to physically express the emotions she was feeling, her boot connected with a shortage chest shattering it, spilling its contents along the floor. She thrashed throwing armour pieces and wood fragments around the room in her anger.

Hearing the terrible news from the story teller him self, Fenris left Varric, to slip into the Hawke manor through the service entrance.  
Orana gasped shaking her head as she saw him "Lady Arianna said no guests." She told him trying to usher him out.  
"Then I'm not a guest." He said flatly.  
The young woman crossed her arms and fixed him with a stern glare. Barely three days in the manor and already a change was seen in her. Hawke had that affect on people, the ability to give you your feet back.  
"I am simply offering my condolences."  
A crash echoed through the house, Orana made to move but he shook his head. The sound came from Hawke's room, he had a feeling what was going on.  
Hawke was too calm on the surface, if he knew anything under calm seas deadly rip tides brewed, Hawke was sea that could rock a babe to sleep.  
Opening the door to her room a vase crashed next to his head.  
"Isn't that my tactic?" He asked shaking the shrapnel from his hair.  
Hawke looked up the embarrassment clear in her face, anger still in her voice. "Your not the only one with anger issues."  
He chuckled quietly to himself "Yours are usually kept under better control."  
"My mothers head was ripped from her body and sewn into some patch work excuse of a woman and you expect me to be calm?" She snapped picking up a piece of discarded armour threw it towards the back wall. "I guess you all want me to go back to being your level headed and fearless leader? How can I lead you misfits when I can't even protect my own family?" Snatching the candlestick off the bedside table she raised her hand to smash it against the bed post. Fenris caught her arm holding it still. Turning in his grasp she glared at him pulling against his steady unrelenting grip. His hand slid up hers forcing the candlestick out. She pushed him with her free hand, it was a struggle to hold on but he did.  
Slowly and surely her struggles eased up, the candlestick falling to clatter against the ground. He pulled her in closed as she lowered to her knees burying her head in his shoulder.  
"I don't know what to say, but I am here." He told her quietly.  
"Am I to blame for not saving her?" Hawke choked through the tears  
"I could say no, but would that help?" He sighed "You are looking for forgiveness, but I'm not the one who can give it to you."  
Silently they sat together, the mess of her anger strewn about them.  
"I wonder." She murmured "If I wasn't sick, if I hadn't slept half the day."  
He pulled her away from him held her by the shoulders "How?" He asked perplexed that she could blame herself for an illness that by rights was Anders fault.  
She looked down at her hand and flexed them. A red glow beginning to emanate from them, "Theres always been a part of me that will do all things necessary to live." Fenris felt the pull, felt the glow tug at his life.  
"You're a Reaver." He gasped pulling away from her.  
She quelled the light from her hands and hung her head.  
He remembered the ominous warning Leandra had given, he thought she was warning him away to save her daughter. In truth it was reverse. "Your mother knew. She tried to tell me."  
Hawke breathed a small laugh. "Two apostates in the family and I get the blood magic."  
Shaking her head wearily she looked up into Fenris' big green eyes, seeing only fear. "I see people like that sick bastard today and I think it's a matter of time before that's me."  
"You made a choice not to use your skills."  
"That's all life and death is to Reavers. A choice. How long until my choices are not governed by right or wrong but want and desire." Her words were filled with terror.  
"Why didn't you?" He searched her, every synapse in his mind telling him to leave, but every fibre of his heart commanding him to listen to her response.  
"You were the only person in the room with me." She raised her head whipping the tears from her eyes. "I would never hurt you. I'd rather die my self."  
She pushed her self to standing picking up a few things slowly clearing away the evidence of her anger.  
Fenris watched her for a time, picking up the shattered pieces, any of the previous rage subdued, she was back to her old self. Her eyes still red but that would fade, taking with it the only sign of her truest emotions. He reached for the door.  
"Being angry, hurt and vengeful doesn't make you a bad person." He told her, reiterating the supportive words she once told him. "It makes you a real person. What matters is what you do with those feelings." He paused a moment hearing her also come to a stop with her cleaning. "You and I are both killers, but its why we kill that separates us from them."


End file.
